By Jinny Ditzler
An antidote to whatever’s keeping you awake at nights
What’s troubling you most these days?
While we all have problems, I’m learning that the way we respond to the big ones can bury the natural wisdom we have to deal with them. Meanwhile we live in a swirl of fear and anxiety — or even guilt because we simply don’t know what to do. We’re stuck!
For example, I’ve known for some time that I would write on this topic. But because it’s so important, I’ve procrastinated. Then once I started I was stuck, desperately browsing for inspiration, scribbling thoughts and scratching them out. I came to a standstill. Here I am again, getting in the way of the good I want to provide.
I did find my way ~ as you can see ~but before I share about that, here are some other folks in similar situations.
A 15-year-old teenager, enthusiastic about school, sports, and friends ~ and adept at them all ~ was diagnosed with ME, better known as the sleeping disease. She had to cut down school hours, quit volleyball, and not travel with her family on vacations, unable to move or do much of anything.
A client who’s been married twice is determined to find the right man. She’s been going on Internet dates, some leading to short-term relationships, but after a time the men stop calling and her desperation is growing.
A young mother, bright and happy, with two good clients to take care of. Recently she became overwhelmed, rushing from one thing to another, desk a mess, missing deadlines, and more anxious than ever. Think deer in the headlights.
What can we do? It seems the more we need to have an issue resolved, the more powerless we become to have it happen. Following are the age old secrets, which seem more applicable now than ever before. Read through to consider them and think about what they mean to you.
3 Surprising Ways for Having Good Come Your Way
These secrets were born centuries ago and are still taught today, so there is nothing new here. Yet we forget them. At the root of each secret is the lesson that it’s our own striving, worrying, grasping, and manipulating that get in the way of our finding the good that’s there for us.
1. Let it go.
Whether it’s our fears concerning things like failing relationships, insufficient finances, serious illness, stalled projects, promises unkept, or concerns about appearance and weight, the disturbance caused by our anxiety keeps the problem in place.
The bottom line is simple:
The good that’s coming our way cannot get through our negative thoughts and actions.
In order to have the relationship I longed for with my husband, I had to give up my stories about him, stop blaming him, and let it all go. None of that mattered or helped. Only when I let go of all of my chaotic thinking did the loving relationship return.
This wisdom from the Venerable Lama Tenzin Samphel shares the lesson well:
In any situation when disturbing emotions occur, you must let them go. The nature of the wisdom mind has to be free, not stagnant. Think about wind, think about water, think about air. Let your wishes go, as you would drop a leaf in the river, knowing that it will find its way without your interference.
Only when I stopped worrying about how to write about this lesson ~ or whether I’d be able to get it right ~did I become quiet enough for the wisdom to shine through.
When my client finally realized she was squeezing the life out of potential relationships and began to trust she’d meet the right one, did a new man (now her husband) give her a call. Trust in yourself. Trust in others. Trust that good is on the way ~ and let go of your need to make it happen.
3. Have faith.
Every time you think about the problem you have to resolve, the pain it’s causing, and your worry about what to do about it, stop.
Only when the teen stopped thinking her life was over and began looking for a path to healing and shifted her attitude did she start to come back. Today three years later, she’s back playing volley ball, been accepted to a prestigious university, and in her words, “I’ve never been happier in my life ~ this illness was the best thing that’s ever happened to me!”
All we need do to have good come our way is to let go of our attachment to having it do so. Let it go, trust, and have faith that good is coming.
The young mother asked for help with getting the mess sorted out, setting priorities, and finding a system to support her to stay on top of what matters. In a matter of hours her faith in herself was restored ~ and she’s on fire!
There is nothing for us to do. This may sound crazy but since I awakened to these secrets several years ago, I’ve seen countless examples of its brilliance in others’ lives and in my own.
When you have faith in yourself and in others, anything is possible.
If you find that these ideas make sense, give them a try. Try them with just one of the your problems and see what happens. What have you got to lose? Do your best to ease away from the effort and anxiety to a place of calm, trust and faith.
Frankly I’ve been astounded at the profound difference these secrets have made in my life, so I share them with you, while remembering to let these words go forward on their own, to the ones who need them.
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