A Suitable Boy (Or Not)

From the age of 26 my well-meaning and well-intentioned mother decided it was time I met a suitable, Indian boy to marry. The fact that I was in a happy relationship with someone else, a French man I met whilst doing my masters, was not taken into consideration.

Fast forward several years and several such introductions, none of whom I wanted to date let alone marry.

To cut a long story short, all those years of meeting men without wanting to be with any of them in addition to being told my mum had sleepless nights because I was not married, played havoc on my self-esteem. Not to mention my recent disappointment at seeing Indian Matchmaker launch on Netflix,  I feel I may have missed an opportunity there.

My feeling of unworthiness permeated into every aspect of my life, especially work. Our extraordinary brain, at least the emotional part, loves staying in the comfort zone of what it knows. In the face of the unknown it

It was quite a number of years later, when I began my coaches training, my first coach helped me realise that I had placed my own sense of worth and value on getting married, thus winning my parents’ approval.  This was, if I can use a late 21st century term, fake news.   Because, for my parents it was from a place of love, and wanting for me what they believed would make me happy.   The reason I’m telling you this is not for you to bring out the violins. Quite the contrary.

The worst thing about going through something, is not knowing what you’re going through. The light bulb moment that shed light on a simple, yet potent fact, freed me to gradually begin to strive for all the things I previously thought myself unworthy of, in terms of my career and even relationships.

Years later with an enormous amount of practice, training and coaching, the ability to challenge my beliefs and open a new file in my brain that serves my development rather than hinders it, is now in my power. As is, accepting this is a long game.

Trust me when I say, this is not about overnight results. Occasionally, (all but 2 days ago) old beliefs and fears pop up. The difference is, there is now a questioning mechanism in place, it takes minutes, hours and days rather months and years to reflect and overcome. With this new ‘superpower’, I challenge myself to do what I would have stopped myself doing in the past, and enjoy having a voice again.

That is what the ‘Boss of your brain’ program is designed for. Within 5 weeks, you will:

  • Become the gatekeeper of your own thoughts.
  • ‘Armour management’ – the freedom to just be ‘you’.
  • Know your worth
  • Own your story

Now is the time to get in touch with me. Let’s get started together.

Warmest regards,


Suparna Malhotra is a Business Coach for high performing Women. Learn more about her and her amazing coaching services here.

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